An undated Sears photo of the couple.

According to accounts of the relationship-ending event, shortly after the pair had crawled into bed and said their “goodnights,” Pete pulled the heavy, down comforter up over his fiancé’s head and tucked it in snug around the base of her head, forming an airtight seal.

As Tonya shouted questions as to “what in the hell Pete was doing,” the self-described funny-man ripped a horrendous fart fueled by a days-worth of room temperature Pabst Blue Ribbon and seven bowls of a his famous bean chili that he had prepared earlier in the day.

Following the release of the dense, foul stench, Tonya began to gag and forced her way out from under the blanket and gasped for a semblance of fresh air.

As Barker laughed uproariously at his latest comic effort, Tonya hurriedly raced around the room; packing her things and notifying her future husband that she was canceling their coming nuptials.

Confident that Tonya was merely blowing off steam, Pete tried to call her bluff by saying that he never really loved her in the first place. Oblivious to his intended sarcasm, Tonya threw her three hundred dollar engagement ring in Barker’s face and ran out to her car promising only to return the next morning to gather the rest of her possessions.

The severity of the situation finally starting to set in, Barker fruitlessly shouted apologies as Tonya slowly pulled out of the driveway. The Dutch Oven, also known as the “Poop Tent,” has been the favorite of adolescent and adult pranksters for centuries, and has tragically been blamed for many of the popular relationship failures throughout recorded history.

Aside from the Barker-Smith breakup, the Dutch Oven has also been credited with the demise of “Brad and Jen,” Elizabeth Taylor’s first seven marriages, and the storied firestorm which was the end of cotton gin inventor Eli Whitney’s relationship with his mistress Sally Beddingfield.