Pondering the great Donny Joust

According to eyewitness accounts, as the multitudes of funnel cake-grease-coated gawkers surrounded the midway maestro, Whitehead remained unfazed and carried himself with the reeking dignity of a dog taking a dump in public. 

 Despite the churning commotion and grammatically incorrect English emanating from the crowd, Troy dished out T-Shirts with breathtaking unicorns on them, novelty license plates boasting lovely flamingoes and palm trees, and even found the time amongst the bedlam to airbrush the romantic sentiment “Tammy + Dave = 4 Ever” on a mirror handed to him by, well, Tammy and Dave-- they plan to hang the mirror behind the head table at their upcoming wedding reception. 

It seems silly to try and recreate the magic of this scene with words because like much of the crowd, I cannot find them.  It is easy to see how the Italians must have felt during the Renaissance-- the creativity and beauty was palpable.  Tammy Gossing of “Tammy and Dave” fame, “We’s jist couldn’t b’lieve it.  Troy Whitehead is a true gift from God.  I don’t even wanna look in the mirror he painted for us for fear of ugly-ing it up.  My future sister-in-law got him to paint up her chest like two hands were grabbin’ her boobies, and my Mom got a apron that says ‘The Bitch Starts Here’ on it…the man can do it all.” 

With so much on his plate and the constantly mounting pressures of carrying the torch passed by Donny Joust, you might think that troy Whitehead is on the same crash course with fate that many of humanity’s geniuses have found themselves on, but Troy says that “so long as he’s blowin’ paint…ain’t nothin’ bad gonna happen.”  Let’s hope he keeps blowin’ for a long time.