That sounds delicious.

While many of these snowy profiteers (a number of them school kids with the day off) simply walk up and down the streets of neighborhoods with shovels slung over their shoulders as they trudge door-to-door in search of lazy or elderly customers, one man figured that he would outsmart the competition by employing a clever slogan that would emphasize his modern, revolutionary snow removal technique-- the snowblower.

With his surefire plan in tact, Larry Jeffers woke up early that fateful day and painted a sign to hang on the sides of his pick-up truck that read “BLOW JOBS: $20, PARKING LOT SERVICE EXTRA!” and went out to claim his fortune.

Jeffers decided that he would drive up and down streets with his snowblower in the bed of his truck and wait for someone to hail him for a job because he didn’t see the point in “freezing his marbles off” with the doorbell ringing method-- a stroke of genius, or so he thought.

Jeffers was surprised that his first hour and a half of driving around hadn’t yet gotten him any work so he decided to couple an ice cream man’s approach with his nifty sign and began to blare out “Baby It’s Cold Outside” from his Chevy’s ample sound system. It was then that his pioneering business strategy really blew up in his face.

Around ten-thirty that morning, a police cruiser pulled up behind Jeffers’ truck and flashed his lights to signal the forty-something jack of all trades to pull over. Jeffers complied and was shocked when he heard the policeman say that they had received “a number of complaints” about a transvestite in a Chevy pick-up that was openly soliciting prostitution in suburban neighborhoods in the area that “used a vulgar sign and a suggestive song to entice johns.”

According to police reports, Jeffers did explain the true nature of the misunderstanding but was still arrested and taken into custody because he was wearing “a woman’s fur coat, pink earmuffs, and Isotoner brand gloves”-- known winter wear of a certain male prostitute that had been arrested last year. Upon arrival at police headquarters, Jeffers told investigators that he was wearing those clothes because “his damned dog pissed all over his winter coat that had his stocking cap and man-gloves in the pockets.”

Because of this, Jeffers claimed that he was forced to wear his wife’s coat, earmuffs, and Isotoners.

A quick phone call to Jeffers’ residence backed-up his story and so he was released with the caveat that he remove the sign from his truck and to “use a little common sense next time.”